Interesting interview with Ian Kerner, a NY based sex therapist. His reason for why couples have bad sex -- "I have a phrase: People change, relationships change, why should sex stay the same? They’re growing as individuals, they’re growing as a couple; but in some ways their sex scripts, the ways in which they have sex, remain static." My take on this is not so much about the sex, but about the earlier part of the statement about how couples just change. Relationships will invariably evolve and I think our approach should evolve as well. If you serve up the same date every friday or saturday night, doesn't the relationship get a bit stale b/c of its predicability alone.

I've always said to make an effort in your relationship. One of the gents I was hanging with this past weekend was telling me of his struggles with his previous relationship. His gf wanted him to plan the weekends, but he always believed just hanging out and being with each other -- even if it was in front of the TV -- was just as good. I told him that woman want that of course, but they also want a man who thinks about the relationship and will subsequently do something special from time to time. Now does that mean special everytime and every weekend -- that's too much of an expectation. Anyway, if your relationship is in a rut, perhaps it's time to evolve it. If you're making an effort and it's not being appreciated, perhaps it's time to evaluate and move on.

Is she someone you think about? Do you want to give her the best? I think that's what we want in a relationship -- someone who we really desire and want to give our best too.